Contributor: Paul Asay

UPDATED REVIEW: Yet another knock-off effect of our culture’s vampire craze, this supernatural CW soap idolizes two angsty blood-sucking brothers, both now in their 160s.

UPDATED REVIEW: Even the “world’s best boss” can’t stick around forever. And now Michael is no more. But, of course, the more things change, the more they stay the same.

This USA series, like the movie franchise that spawned it, is predicated on wanton, indiscriminate killing.

It’s a pretty place just down the street from Twin Peaks, a county or two over from Gracepoint, and just a stone’s throw away from The Twilight Zone.

UPDATED REVIEW: Is Fox’s Family Guy crass? Vulgar? Offensive? Inappropriate? Of course—and those are perhaps the only things Plugged In and creator Seth MacFarlane would agree on.

Everyone in Arcadia is seeing dead people these days—or people who used to be dead. Why are they all coming back? What does it all mean? If ABC has its way, we might not know the answers for several seasons.

FX and Marvel have teamed up on Legion, the tale of a tormented antihero whose story feels more like a horror movie than a comic book.

The “mature audiences” label this Netflix superhero show bears can be largely attributed to the immaturity of its central character.

Dr. Megan Hunt is a brilliant forensic scientist doing her best to balance her professional and personal lives … while trying to catch the bad guys, of course. Wait—haven’t we seen this before?

No longer Lost, Josh Holloway’s gone from chasing smoke monsters to collaring terrorists—with the help of a nifty computer chip inside his head. He’s smarter for it … but the show is not.

UPDATED REVIEW: Something’s rotten in the town of Charming. It’s not the apricots, we can tell you that. But it just might have something to with all those hogs out on the road.

UPDATED REVIEW: Yet another New York City cop show on CBS … that somehow manages to focus on family just as much as felons.

Hell on Wheels has the feel of those old 19th-century dime novels—with the addition of as much sex and violence as AMC felt it could cram into a TV-14 rating.

UPDATED REVIEW: Disney’s new sitcom doesn’t shake free from the Mouse House’s temperate template … but it still may leave parents shaking their heads.

A certain segment of Netflix’s subscribers like pure, unambiguous trash, right?