Lainy has always known she wanted to be a mom. In fact, when she was little, she forced her best friend, Kate, to play pretend as though they were giving birth to their babydolls on the school playground.
But as odd as that experience was, it solidified their bond. Both girls had lost their mothers at a young age. So, as Lainy told Kate, they would need to be there for each other when they decided to have children for real.
Lainy just wasn’t expecting Kate to get pregnant first.
Lainy is happy for Kate, truly. But Kate wasn’t even sure if she wanted to be a mom. Plus, now Kate is bonding with their extravagant coworker—fellow mom-to-be and social media influencer wannabe, Shirley—over their pregnancies, an experience Lainy had always hoped to share with Kate herself.
Envious of her friend and just about every other pregnant woman out there, Lainy then does something rather odd—odder, even, than simulating labor with dolls. Lainy straps on a false baby bump and starts telling people she’s pregnant.
It’s pretty glorious for a while: Strangers congratulate her; people give up their seats on the subway; folks step out of her way on the street. Then Lainy attends a prenatal yoga class and bonds with an actual expecting mother, Megan.
The two women commiserate over pregnancy woes and quickly become friends. In fact, Lainy even starts dating Megan’s brother, Josh.
But pretty soon, the truth gets harder and harder to hide. For starters, Megan runs in some of the same circles as Kate and Shirley, who know nothing of Lainy’s charade. But what’s more is that sooner or later, Lainy’s going to need to give birth.
And I’m pretty sure Megan and Josh won’t be fooled by a babydoll.
Lainy and Megan become friends because Lainy is the first person whom Megan feels like she can be real around. For Megan, pregnancy is traumatic, since she almost died after giving birth to her first child. So she appreciates that Lainy doesn’t expect her to be super excited all the time about being pregnant.
Obviously, Megan is hurt when she learns that Lainy has been lying to her. However, she also realizes that Lainy wasn’t trying to hurt her, she just wanted a friend. So she accepts Lainy’s apology.
When Kate learns that Lainy has been faking a pregnancy, she comforts her friend. She recognizes that Lainy only did it because she was feeling lonely and desperate. And Lainy admits she was jealous of Kate, Kate’s husband and even Kate’s baby. The two women apologize and reconcile.
There are some flawed but still positive messages for women in Kinda Pregnant about learning to love and accept yourself before searching for love elsewhere.
A few women say some unkind things about their husbands while pregnant, but it becomes clear that they really do love their spouses.
People do yoga.
Lainy and Josh have sex in his room, which is currently located in his sister’s garage. Clothing and blankets cover them (we see Lainy’s legs and Josh’s chest), and we see their movements. There’s an awkward discussion about oral sex, but the act doesn’t happen. They’re interrupted when one of them accidentally hits the garage-door opener, revealing their actions to a neighbor family with two children. (The mother covers her son’s eyes, but he keeps trying to peek.)
Lainy is a middle school teacher, and she often gets into uncomfortable and inappropriate conversations with her students about sex. After an emotional breakup, she tells them that in Romeo and Juliet, Romeo just wanted to have sex with Juliet. And she also mentions a threesome, a phrase she then has to explain when one of her students asks what that is.
A woman wears a dress that is several sizes too small over a bra and bodysuit, believing the garment to be a gift. When she learns it’s not a gift, she rips it off in anger in front of a crowded restaurant. Women wear revealing clothes elsewhere.
One of Lainy’s coworkers frequently wears corset-like tops and short skirts to work, dancing inappropriately in front of her students. She also wears a breast-pump bra to work, using it openly in front of her students.
A man surprises his long-term girlfriend not with the proposal she was hoping for but a request to have a threesome. The woman then learns he has been sleeping with someone else. After they break up, she hears his new voicemail message, which features him with another man and woman, clearly in the middle of intercourse. And it’s also implied that the guy goes on to have multiple sexual partners all at once.
Several couples kiss and make out.
People describe body parts and sex in crass detail throughout Kinda Pregnant. A woman talks about masturbation. When people ask Lainy who her baby’s father is, she makes up a wild story about a one-night stand. Someone asks Lainy if she’s married to a man or a woman. Lainy jokingly says she wishes she could be Kate’s husband. A man pantomimes sex with a baseball bat between his legs, and a woman says he’s the reason many women become lesbians. A woman pantomimes sex elsewhere. And there’s still more crude anatomical humor in other scenes.
A 15-year-old girl, believing that pregnancy will give her glowing skin, tells her mom she wants to get pregnant. Her mom tells her no. Unfortunately, we see that same girl pregnant in a later scene, and her mom is clearly upset.
Lainy accidentally touches testicles on a tiger statue. A woman says she milked a cow. However, it turns out the animal is a male alpaca and that she was pleasuring it.
Although Kinda Pregnant largely focuses on women who are pregnant and excited to have children, the film’s rhetoric is also supportive of abortion in multiple scenes. We hear that a pregnant woman had an abortion once before. She’s early in her current pregnancy; and though she isn’t considering another termination, she says her baby isn’t a baby yet but an embryo. (Another woman says the baby isn’t even that, calling it “fermenting” semen.)
Jealous that Kate is pregnant, Lainy initially demands Kate should get an abortion, though she later recants these feelings. And when someone mistakenly believes Lainy is pregnant and seeking abortion, she tries to convince her to keep her baby. A woman says her mother tried to abort her. When a man believes he got a woman pregnant, he crudely asks if she’s planning to keep the baby, hoping she’ll say no.
Megan tells Lainy that she almost died after giving birth to her first child because she started bleeding out. Because of this, being pregnant is pretty traumatic for her.
A woman having a breakdown sets several books on fire in a trash can. She realizes after the fact that this was dangerous and advises her classroom to evacuate. Someone crashes a Zamboni into several cars and a food stand.
While pretending to be pregnant, Lainy repeatedly falls and otherwise hits her belly. People are understandably shocked in these moments, worried she may have hurt her baby. In one scene, a little boy accidentally stabs Lainy’s fake belly with a knife. Later, when he sees her without the belly, he asks if he killed her baby. Elsewhere, Lainy’s fake belly catches on fire.
A woman who can’t swim accidentally gets knocked into a pool. People immediately jump in to save her, and she’s apparently bleeding from an injury.
Someone makes a joke about death. Lainy jokingly issues a death threat. Someone pantomimes shooting himself in the head.
There are more than 50 uses of the f-word and more than 20 of the s-word. We also hear frequent uses of “a–,” “a–hole,” “b–ch,” “d–mit,” “d–k,” “h—” and “p-ss.” There’s a use of the British profanity “bleeding.” We also hear some vulgar slang for female anatomy and some unkind terms for women.
God’s name is abused nearly 50 times in Kinda Pregnant, twice paired with “d–mit.” Jesus’ name is also misused once. Some makes a crude hand gesture.
A middle school guidance counselor vapes almost constantly throughout the film, and she later says it’s marijuana. She blows the smoke into a guy’s face at one point. She claims to be able to smell cocaine on one of her students. When a student turns in a joint she found at school, the teacher whom the student reports it to keeps it for herself.
People drink throughout Kinda Pregnant. Two pregnant women have some wine. A man says he doesn’t drink because he’s an angry drunk. However, in a stressful moment, he breaks that self-imposed rule. Lainy says she’s the child of an alcoholic.
When Lainy’s lies start to catch up to her, someone recommends she pretend to have a miscarriage so she won’t get caught. Another woman pretends to be pregnant like Lainy, but she only does it for an hour or so.
We see the tops of a woman’s thighs as she uses the toilet. When a man asks why a pregnancy test is wet, his wife informs him it’s urine. Several pregnant women pass gas during a yoga class.
Two young girls simulate labor on a playground, screaming in imitation of women giving birth. A man gets upset with his girlfriend for causing a scene after he reveals bad news.
A woman becomes self-conscious about her appearance and bleaches her upper lip after a student tells her she has a mustache. A salesclerk, believing Lainy is pregnant, makes several comments about her appearance, inadvertently insulting Lainy since she isn’t actually pregnant. Lainy also says some derogatory things about female scientists.
A guidance counselor repeatedly insults her students throughout Kinda Pregnant, even threatening to have one put up for adoption. Multiple students take out their phones when their teacher leaves the classroom, hiding the devices quickly when she returns.
We hear that someone has three restraining orders against her for stalking people.
I sometimes feel that if you’ve seen one Amy Schumer movie, you’ve seen them all. And for me, Kinda Pregnant was no different. Tons of language and crass sexual talk? Check. Awkward sex scene played for laughs? Check. Weird concept with a semi-feminist message? Check.
But seriously, this film is riddled with inappropriate content. There are more than 50 uses of the f-word alone. And even though tries to shine a light on how uncomfortable pregnancy can be, it often does so in some pretty crass ways. We hear a lot of talk about sex and witness the aforementioned awkward sex scene. Abortion and preborn babies are pretty much treated like a joke. And it’s all accompanied by a poorly delivered and weak message about the importance of loving “your female self.”
All in all, Kinda Pregnant is probably not a movie you want to waste your time on. And you won’t be missing out. Because, like I said, if you’ve seen one Amy Schumer flick, you’ve seen them all.
Emily studied film and writing when she was in college. And when she isn’t being way too competitive while playing board games, she enjoys food, sleep, and geeking out with her husband indulging in their “nerdoms,” which is the collective fan cultures of everything they love, such as Star Wars, Star Trek, Stargate and Lord of the Rings.
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