Combating Our ‘iPad Kid’ Tendencies

If you have a child who is 8 years old or younger, you may be surprised to learn just how much screen time they’re racking up.

A 2025 report from Common Sense Media says the average screentime for Gen Alpha is nearly 2.5 hours per day. Although screentime recommendations vary across different age groups, that’s still a half hour more than what experts say is “acceptable.”

Now, of course, I am not trying to shame anyone here. Sometimes, we need the screens to help manage the chaos of parenting. When I was growing up, portable DVD players helped ease the pain of many a long car ride. And if you need to whip out your phone to entertain an unruly toddler in a crowded restaurant—especially if you’ve already received your food—I get it. (After all, Mom and Dad deserve a hot meal, too!)

But with so many studies telling us what we should and shouldn’t allow our children to do regarding technology, it can be overwhelming. Sometimes, reading these reports can make us feel guilty or even fearful that we’re inadvertently harming our kids. Other times, we might read a statistic and shrug it off, feeling that it doesn’t apply or doesn’t matter.

So what should parents be mindful of in the screentime battle? And what are some easy steps we can take to ensure a positive screen experience without completely upending our lives?

Be Mindful of How and When Screens Are Used

– What are your kids using screentime for?

As parents, we want to justify screentime use: Our kids can and arguably should use tablets to video-chat with family members or friends, to do their homework or even to read digital books. Those are healthy, productive uses of their time.

Unfortunately, that’s just not what kids most frequently use screentime for. According to the Common Sense Census, children between the ages of 0-8 years old most often use their devices to watch TV or online videos, accounting for 60% of all screentime. And what are they watching? Usually streaming services (35% of the time), such as Netflix or Disney+, or online videos (32%), such as YouTube. And even though they’re technically too young to create social media accounts, some children are watching videos on TikTok and Instagram, too.

The second-most popular use of screens was playing video games (26% of the time). Since 2011, the amount of time kids play games on computers, consoles or handheld devices has remained pretty consistent. But time spent playing games on phones or tablets has increased significantly, from an average of three minutes per day in 2011 to 21 minutes in 2024. And, of course, the older your child is, the more time they spend playing those games. Children under the age of 2 only average one minute per day while kids between 5 and 8 average more than 30 minutes.

Now, that rise in gaming time may be at least partly due to more children than ever having their own devices. Four in 10 kids have their own tablets by age 2. By age 8, 68% have their own tablets and 23% have their own cellphones.

But correlation doesn’t automatically equal causation: Kids can just as easily access games and videos through Mom and Dad’s devices as they can through their own. However, if your child has unmonitored access to any screens (even the seemingly more innocuous television set), it does warrant the next question:

– What screentime or content limits are you setting?

Roughly three out of every four parents express some sort of concern about screen media. Eight in 10 parents worry about excessive screentime. And three out of four are anxious about exposure to inappropriate content. Yet 75% of parents are not using any sort of tool or setting to limit screentime. And 51% haven’t bothered to restrict the types of content their children consume either.

That said, you may not necessarily need to use built-in tools or settings to monitor your child’s screentime. When dealing with younger kids, you have a lot more control over when they use screens and what they see when they do. Because they’re less independent, it’s easier to keep track of how long they’ve been watching TV or playing on the tablet. It’s only as our kids get older that we begin to worry about them switching the channel when we leave the room or scrolling through YouTube videos unchecked. Which is probably why 88% of parents feel confident in their screen parenting when their children are babies, but only 68% still feel confident by the time their kids turn 5.

To combat this, most parents (74%) say they watch their children’s shows alongside them. And about 6 in 10 co-watch YouTube videos, too. This is an excellent practice, since it allows you to ask your child questions to help them engage with the content more, to learn more about your child’s specific viewing interests and to address any problematic content immediately.

But it’s unlikely that we can always monitor what our kids are watching or playing. If you’re driving the car while your child plays on their tablet in the backseat, you’re probably not able to exercise much control. Or if they’re watching TV in their bedroom while you’re in the kitchen getting dinner ready. These aren’t bad habits, per se, but they are examples we should be mindful of. And they point to another important question to ask yourself:

– When are you allowing screentime to occur?

We’ve heard a lot about “iPad kids” and “blue light stare.” They’re common terms applied to Gen Alpha (children born between 2010 and 2024), because more so than previous generations—even their older, Gen Z siblings—these kids have never lived in a world without access to a tablet or smartphone. Their parents, Millennials and Zoomers, have largely grown up in an age where most homes have at least one TV and one computer, video games are a common source of entertainment and music doesn’t exclusively come from a radio or phonograph.

Parents of iPad kids may not be as attuned to the problem of screens because we’ve never really lived in a world without them. As such, we may be more liable to use our screens as a pseudo-babysitter: Nearly two-thirds of parents allow screen media to entertain their child in order to get things done or take time for themselves; 47% permit screen media as a reward for good behavior; 44% use screens to keep their kids occupied in public spaces (such as the doctor’s office or grocery store); and 25% even admit to using screen media as a method for calming their child down when that child is angry or upset.

Again, I’m not trying to shame anybody here. But I am saying that we should be mindful of how often we do this. If you turn on the tablet whenever you get in the car, even for short drives to the store (as 37% of parents do), then you could inadvertently create a dependency on that screen—and woe to those families when the tablet runs out of juice. Similarly, allowing your child to eat dinner in front of the TV every night (which 23% of parents say they “sometimes” or “often” do) could result in that child struggling to finish their meal or even throwing a tantrum when a video isn’t playing.

The point in all of this is that we should be mindful of how and when screens are used. And luckily, no matter how bad we may sometimes allow screentime to get—whether because it’s too much or not quality enough—we can always make improvements.

5 Easy Ways to Combat Screentime Problems

• Experts recommend delaying the purchase of personal devices for kids, such as tablets and cellphones, for as long as possible. This gives parents an added level of control since kids will likely have to request permission to use any household screens.
• Enable parental controls or perhaps create separate user profiles for children across all devices your child may use. (Focus on the Family’s Plugged In has several tutorials you can access on their homepage and YouTube channel.)
• Create “No phone zones” and screen-free times in your home to ensure devices are used where you can monitor both the time spent using them and the content being seen.
• Co-watch shows and videos and co-play games with your child as often as possible. This will allow you to immediately address any problematic content and to get a feel for what sort of entertainment your child most enjoys.
• Encourage non-screen activities, such as reading or listening to music, whenever you can, especially when your kids say they’re “bored.” Kids actually spend an average of 30 minutes each day reading or being read to. They also spend about half an hour a day listening to music. These forms of entertainment can sometimes be easier to monitor for problematic content and also don’t require a ton of creativity from busy parents.

Remember, screens don’t have to be the enemy. About 7 out of 10 parents see screen media as a helpful tool. It can be a good source for learning, exploration, connection, creativity and more. But we, as the parents of the children using these devices, still have to do our part. It may seem excessive to apply screentime rules to a toddler, but implementing good habits early on may make the screentime battle a lot easier to win as your child grows up.