Crime
Long Bright River
Long Bright River is a fairly standard mystery thriller with a big theme at its core: choices. But its problematic content makes it a touch choice to watch.
Surf culture is a unique way of life. On the surface, it seems surfers prefer to go with the flow, both in and out of the water. And when troubles come, there’s nothing a board and a wave can’t fix.
But dive just a bit deeper and there’s can be some serious drama unfolding.
Surfers—while generally known for their laid-back attitudes and love of the ocean—can get pretty territorial. Trespass on another surfer’s turf–whether it be a secret surf spot, a love interest or the surf gear marketplace–and you might find yourself fighting with fists instead of words.
That’s where Trotter finds himself in this 1971 tale about two burgeoning Australian surf brands.
First, Trot “stole” Tracy from his best mate, Snapper. Of course, as Tracy reminds Snap, Trot didn’t steal her so much as he just put her first and didn’t cheat on her.
But then Trot and Tracy created a rival surfing gear brand. (Tracy even got the seed money from Snap by lying that she needed the cash to pay for her and Trot’s wedding.)
Now, the former best friends are bitter rivals. And their go-with-the-flow, laidback way of life has been replaced by the commercialization of surfing.
Trot and his buddies are pretty much your grandmother’s worst idea of hippies. In Barons (which originally aired in Australia in 2022 before coming to the CW), they spend their days partying, drinking, doing drugs (especially marijuana) and having casual sex. They also vehemently oppose the ongoing Vietnam War, and one man resists the draft by running away.
Language is relatively mild in this TV-14 show. We see a fair amount of skin and sensuality, though no crucial body parts are exposed. And in case you couldn’t tell from context, people sometimes get into violent fistfights.
Though not the worst show to come from the CW, Barons is still built on the network’s trademark petty drama. And it’s unlikely to inspire any real-life surfers, either.
Snapper and Trotter’s friendship ends when Trotter opens a rival surfing company behind Snapper’s back.
Two men get into a fistfight. Snapper chokes a man and must be physically pulled away by his friends. Someone pushes a trailer off a cliff. A guy purposely electrocutes himself as a joke but passes out (though he’s OK). A man shoots at several surfers trespassing on his property.
Many people oppose the Vietnam War. Someone calls the government “fascists” for their participation in the war. One man runs away when he is drafted. His father disowns him after finding out.
We see an unwed couple kissing and lying, presumably naked, in bed (covered by sheets). Trot and Tracy live together before they marry. There are many references to sex. A recently married woman wonders if her new husband cheated on her just before their nuptials. (He denies it, but someone implies that his denial is false.) Couples kiss frequently. We see surfers in tight-fitting wetsuits and revealing swimwear. There’s an unseemly reference to male genitals.
Characters drink heavily and smoke marijuana throughout the episode. Trot gets upset when he learns Snap is smuggling other illegal drugs. We see several drug deals go down.
A guy urinates. We hear the surfers hazed a kid by shaving his head. A man wears a tinfoil hat and says that it blocks people from reading his mind. We hear a few uses each of “d–n,” “p-ss” and the Australian expletive “bloody.” God’s name is misused four times.
Emily studied film and writing when she was in college. And when she isn’t being way too competitive while playing board games, she enjoys food, sleep, and geeking out with her husband indulging in their “nerdoms,” which is the collective fan cultures of everything they love, such as Star Wars, Star Trek, Stargate and Lord of the Rings.
Long Bright River is a fairly standard mystery thriller with a big theme at its core: choices. But its problematic content makes it a touch choice to watch.
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