If you live in the Harlem area of New York City and you hear the music of a stringed orchestra wafting across the street, it may not be that your neighbor left the TV on. You might live near the de la Motte family—all 13 of them.
Amber and Marc de la Motte have 11 children: (*deep breath*) Josiah, Pearl, Elijah, Naomi, Noah, Anna, Chloe, Enoch, Melody, Moses and Netta. At 4 years old, Josiah fell in love with the violin, and from there the music bug spread through the family. Each de la Motte kid plays a stringed instrument, and each kid is wildly talented. Four of them were accepted to the Juilliard School—perhaps the nation’s most famous music conservatory–and Pearl even earned a full-ride scholarship, which is basically the musical equivalent of winning the Super Bowl, the NBA finals and the Kentucky Derby with your hands tied behind your back.
If this all sounds like prime reality show material, don’t worry. Amber beat you to the punch. Instead of heading to network TV, though, she started recording her family’s everyday life and posting it to YouTube under the channel “The Happy Caravan.”
In her vlogs, Amber invites viewers along as she and her family shop for groceries, play music, and navigate daily life as a family of 13. She’s almost always the one filming; the family YouTube channel and social media accounts are her full-time job ( in addition to raising 11 kids, of course) and she could singlehandedly put the “happy” in “Happy Caravan.” No matter what, she’s always smiling, and she gives glory to God through everything life throws their way.
Oh, yeah — the de la Mottes are Christians, too! It’s not the main focus of their channel, so it doesn’t come up in every video. But they don’t avoid the subject, either. According to Marc in an interview with The Free Press, they go to a “standard Christian nondenominational church,” though he admits that they “never get there on time.” (Hey, you try getting 11 kids from Harlem to Chinatown on the New York subway sometime.)
Fifteen years ago, the de la Mottes may have gone the way of the Duggars (of 19 Kids and Counting fame), signing a deal with TLC and churning out episodes until the end of time (they did actually film a special for TLC, but it wasn’t picked up for a series). Now, with the rise of YouTube and social media, the de la Mottes avoid network interference, allow them a national audience and allow you to check in with the Happy Caravan any time you want.
Obviously, social media isn’t always an honest representation of reality. It can be cut, edited and tweaked until it’s just how the poster wants to be perceived. But unless Amber and Marc are Oscar-worthy editors or Oscar-worthy actors, it’s clear that they’re absolutely obsessed with their kids.
Amber constantly raves about her children’s talents, and she shows off their abilities every chance she gets. It’s not just their skill she’s proud of, though; she loves how passionate and creative they are, and she does everything she can to encourage it. In fact, the kids’ music is exactly why they suffer insanely high NYC housing prices, which brings no shortage of challenges. The de la Mottes used to live in San Diego, but they moved across the country so their kids could receive the best possible musical training. Amber always reiterates that while the move was difficult, it was worth it a hundred times over if it helps their children thrive.
Amber and Marc aren’t just dedicated to their children’s musical growth, though. In vlogs, Amber is kind-but-firm to her kids, listening patiently while still setting boundaries. In one shopping haul video, 4-year-old Moses asks to get a box of Froot Loops. “We can get that as a special treat!” Amber answers—but only if “we get a slightly healthier cereal, too.” The de la Mottes are all about balance; sure, fruits and veggies are important, but a frozen pizza never killed anyone, either.
The de la Motte’s Christian faith is a big positive, too. Again, it doesn’t come up all the time, but they don’t shy away when it does. In a video about their youngest daughter Netta’s complicated birth, Amber and Marc thank God for getting them through a tough delivery. In a vlog about why they chose to have so many children, Amber talks about God’s providence and says that she admired other big families at their church in San Diego.
On the topic of that church in San Diego: Amber and Marc used to attend an Independent Fundamental Baptist church, but they left because they felt that the church leadership was controlling and “cultish.” Amber describes their experience in a hour-long video called “Ex-IFB: My Shiny Happy People Story” (inspired by the documentary series Shiny Happy People, which focuses on controversial religious sects). While we can’t know the truth of what really went on at the de la Motte’s church, it’s clear that Amber and Marc made their decision with their children’s safety in mind, and they share their stories so that others can do what’s best for their families.
“We love Jesus and the Bible,” Amber clarifies in the vlog’s video description, “and this experience hasn’t diminished our faith.”
To a casual viewer, the Happy Caravan is as wholesome as wholesome can be. A big family who loves Jesus, goes grocery shopping together and plays Mozart on the front porch? What could possibly be wrong with that?
Nothing, of course, is wrong with that. But the constant stream of content, most of which is focused on children, does raise the question: How healthy is it for a child’s entire life to be recorded and posted online for the world to see?
Amber posts on the Happy Caravan about once a week. Each video averages about an hour long, and many document events that in any other family would stay…well, in the family. Christmas morning, Enoch’s birthday, Josiah’s wedding. Netta, the youngest de la Motte, has quite literally been on the internet since the day she was born: Marc had a camera out the moment she left the womb. The Happy Caravan’s 200k+ YouTube subscribers knew her name before she did.
It’s not anyone’s job to tell Amber and Marc how to parent, of course. And again, it’s clear they think their kids are the best thing since Beethoven’s Fifth Symphony. But it is a bit odd to watch a child’s life play out when they’re barely old enough to understand that anyone is watching. For parents, it may be worth having a conversation with their own kids about how much is too much to share online.
In terms of content, the Happy Caravan is mostly squeaky-clean. In her video about their church in San Diego, Amber alludes to accusations that a pastor was “doing inappropriate things with minors,” both boys and girls. She briefly references homosexuality with a qualifier of “however you may feel about it …” She doesn’t comment on how she and Marc feel about the issue.
The de la Mottes are no strangers to controversy. A quick scroll through their TikTok comments reveals accusations of exploitation, performative parenting, and even child abuse. Viewers question if all 11 kids are actually passionate about music, or if they’re being forced into it to generate content. Some claim it’s irresponsible for Amber and Marc to have so many children when they struggle to pay for housing.
It’s irrational and, frankly, a waste of time to speculate on these issues, especially when the people speculating will likely never even meet the de la Mottes. But all controversies surrounding the family boil down to one single point: They live their lives online, and therefore their children do too.
Amber is very open about her and Marc’s goals: Social media will get the kids noticed, which will establish their brand, which will lead to musical success. And sure, maybe the older kids are all aboard. But what about 4-year-old Moses? What about newborn Netta, immortalized on the internet before her own mother had a chance to hold her? Every parent has a right to decide what’s best for their own families, of course—but perhaps this channel is an opportunity for the parents watching to decide how much they should share in their own families.
The Happy Caravan is a wholesome, family-friendly channel with positive Christian themes. But parents should consider the question behind all 13 de la Motte smiles: does the world really need to see everything you do, and what happens when they see too much?
Lauren Cook is serving as a 2021 summer intern for the Parenting and Youth department at Focus on the Family. She is studying film and screenwriting at the University of North Carolina School of the Arts. You can get her talking for hours about anything from Star Wars to her family to how Inception was the best movie of the 2010s. But more than anything, she’s passionate about showing how every form of art in some way reflects the Gospel. Coffee is a close second.
