It’s been six years since the last big megalodon attack. And in that time, a few things have calmed down.
For one thing, everyone is pretty confident that the gargantuan prehistoric shark threat is under control. Sure, there are megs out there in the 25,000-foot-deep Mariana Trench. But a super-cold thermocline layer of water keeps them in check.
The facility even has its own captive meg to study and learn from, nicknamed Haiqi.
The second calming change is in diver Jonas Taylor’s life. He no longer needs to constantly risk life and limb in deadly deep-sea rescue efforts. He’s now more of an eco-warrior and dad who lives at an underwater research facility, Mana One. There, he parents a teen girl named Meiying. (Meiying’s mom was Jonas’ love who passed away.)
So now the newly laid-back Jonas works at being more conservative and kid-focused. He makes mature, parental choices between bouts of punching environmental terrorists in the face.
Yes, everything is pretty good right now. The Mana researchers are still exploring and mapping the Trench, but they’re doing it safely with new high-tech mini-subs and Iron Man-like exosuits.
It’s all as safe and calm as can be.
Well … almost.
The problem is, during one such exploratory session with the Mana subs, Jason and the other crewmembers realize that Haiqi has escaped her containment area. She not only threatens the subs but follows them past the thermocline layer.
Oh, but that’s not all.
It’s also meg mating season. That’s why Haiqi has been so anxious as of late. So there are a couple other massive Megs there eager to meet her.
Oh, but that’s not all again.
While Jason and the two sub crews are doing their best to avoid contact with the, uh, frisky megs, they come upon a large underwater station in an uncharted part of the Trench. This group of divers is illegally mining über-valuable rare-earth minerals.
And just as the megs and the subs happen by, the panicked rogue miners set off a massive explosion. It not only causes a catastrophic underwater landslide, it also traps the subs and rips a hole in the thermocline layer, too.
Whoa, Nelly.
It looks like calm and wise-choice-making Jason needs to risk a little life and limb once again.
Teen Meiying tends to make a number of “teen” choices that aren’t always wise. (Which isn’t so great.) But Jason and Meiying’s uncle, Jiuming, are both ready to put everything on the line to protect her. They both love her dearly. Even in the midst of heroic actions, they put her wellbeing first. Jason even begs her to stay in a place of safety at one point so that he can give his full attention into the massive beasty threat on hand.
However, as the two men leap in to save innocent lives, Meiying is so inspired by their bravery that she can’t help but rush to help others, too. She rescues endangered swimmers and a puppy. Eventually Jason tells her how proud he is of her self-sacrificial choices. Meiying expresses love for Jason and her uncle.
There are others, including two guys named Mac and D.J., who work to protect the innocent as well. Early on in the film, Jason works to bring environmental terrorists to justice.
None.
It’s made clear that it is meg mating season, but we don’t see anything other than the gigantic sharks swimming around one another in circles.
The action of the film—including massive sharks and an octopus in the water and ravenous dinosaurs on land—ends up swirling about a resort island packed with swimsuit-clad tourists. We see a number of shirtless men, and women in revealing bikinis, running into and out of the water.
A guy at the resort leeringly suggests that two young women rub suntan oil on his back … and front. A man with a bag full of “emergency items” also has a package of condoms in his supplies.
A man and a woman kiss passionately.
This is a film about 70-foot-long sharks. Also, a gigantic octopus and scores of dog-sized, ferocious dinosaurs. For much of the film, they’re quite busy attacking and sinking their teeth into screaming crowds of people. So it’s going to be messy, even for a PG-13 movie.
The biggest goopy gush happens early on as a hungry meg chomps down on the head and torso of a T. rex. B ut we still get plenty of torn-flesh visuals thereafter. One of the giant sharks smashes through supposedly meg-proof glass to swallow a woman. Megs move through a beach area scooping up swimmers and paddle boaters in their massive maws. An enormous octopus snatches people off boats and docks with its huge tentacles. And the smaller dinosaurs swim in to bite the bodies of victims, leap on panicked people en masse, and drag women into the brush by their legs.
The megs swallow deep sea divers and demolish underwater steel structures. They rip up docks and sink boats, chase down a Jet Ski and rise up out of the deep repeatedly with a mouthful of people. One of the massive sharks even gets into a chomping, tentacle-wrapping battle with the 80-foot-long octopus. This sort of deadly havoc—seen both up close and at a distance—is often fast and rushing at the screen. A bloody wave is generally left in the monster’s wake after it feeds.
The humans unleash their own onslaught of destruction, of course. Baddies cause a massive deep-sea explosion that not only rips up the ocean floor and destroys underwater vehicles, but also murders their own divers. Men with automatic weapons shoot at Jason and his fellows at every turn. A cracked exo-suit mask implodes under pressure, killing the woman wearing it. People are purposely left to drown in a flooding underwater compartment. Others get tased and battered around.
Creatures are covered in fuel and set afire. A fuel tank explodes. A meg gets impaled. Someone is stabbed in the leg and then left to be swallowed by a predator. Etc.
The dialogue contains three or four s-words and a half-dozen uses each of “a–” and “h—.” Those profanities get mixed in with several uses each of “d–n,” “b–ch” and “b–tard.” Someone makes a crude hand gesture.
Guests at a beach resort island are seen drinking adult beverages. Jason and his compatriots also pour and drink glasses of alcohol.
Meiying disobeys Jason repeatedly. She sneaks aboard a sub, putting herself in danger. She also runs into danger several more times.
Members of the Mana organization betray Jason and Jiuming, killing some people and threatening lasting devastation for the sake of profit. One of Jason’s compatriots tends to turn her heel and flee at any sign of danger. She deserts endangered people several times and almost shoots someone to save her own skin.
If you know anything about 2018’s The Meg, and its bombastic Jaws-on-steroids shark tale, then you know what you might expect from Meg 2: The Trench.
You get that and more.
Instead of just one gigantic, razor-toothed megamouth, you get three … and a behemoth octopus … and a bunch of small ravenous dinosaur thingies that haven’t had a good meal in 65 million years. Throw in Jason Statham and Chinese action star Jing Wu, as well as a gaggle of environmentally evil bad guys with automatic weaponry, and you’ve got about two hours of over-the-top death and destruction mixed with breathless heroism that borders on the absurd.
Now, that’s not to suggest that this crazy shark-fest spectacle is anything less than exactly what director Ben Wheatley wanted it to be. Nor am I suggesting that there won’t be viewers who gobble it all up with a large bucket of popcorn and exit the theater with a satisfied belch.
I’m simply saying that this slice of screechy summertime cinema gnoshes through scores and scores of victims before its baddies go down. The perils are deadly. And even its humorous bits involve someone being dragged off or snarfed up as a quick juicy snack.
Keep all of that in mind before packing the kids in the car.
After spending more than two decades touring, directing, writing and producing for Christian theater and radio (most recently for Adventures in Odyssey, which he still contributes to), Bob joined the Plugged In staff to help us focus more heavily on video games. He is also one of our primary movie reviewers.
