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Movie Review

When Michael finds out his woman-of-a-lifetime-soon-to-be-bride is the daughter of a Mafioso, he's not concerned. After all, he's marrying her, not her family. Poor silly Englishman; he's got so much to learn about crime in New York. It's not long before he's "inadvertently" drawn into money laundering and murder. Realizing things are never going to get better (Gina's father has been ordered by the "family" to "whack" him), he teams up with the FBI in an elaborate setup to bring down The Mob. In the meantime, he has to pass himself off as the notorious "Mickey Blue Eyes," an unlikely Mafia hit man. The FBI gets its man in the end and Gina and Michael are left to start their lives together free from Mob rule.

Positive Elements: Michael is determined to marry Gina despite her family baggage. Realizing that she's the woman for him, he won't let anything stand in their way to lifelong wedded bliss. When things get hot, he turns to the proper authorities to solve his problem and he goes out of his way to make it clear that he doesn't want any favors from the Mafia. He wants to make his business a success on his own, without their interference (not that his vocal protests stop his new "family" from "trying to help"). Gina's father loves her dearly and proves it by his actions on several occasions.

Spiritual Content: A vile and bloody painting depicting Jesus firing a machine gun at a person is used as a prop in several scenes. The piece of art was painted by one of the Mobsters and utilized to launder money through Michael's auction house (thankfully, Michael is appalled by the blasphemous subject matter).

Sexual Content/Nudity: No actual sex scenes, but the script implies sexual activity between Gina and Michael. Michael is shown with another man in a bathroom stall (dialogue is constructed to imply gay sex—in fact the two are merely switching shirts). In another, an overly friendly cocktail waitress sits on his lap and reaches down to touch his crotch. Several paintings show nudity. One, featuring an obese woman, shows her bare bottom. Michael takes his pants off and wiggles his body for Gina to distract her from seeing the contraband painting. Gina's brother poses for a picture wearing only underwear.

Violent Content: Quite subdued for this genre. Gunfire is traded several times (between rival Mob factions, and between police and The Mob). Pouches filled with fake blood (called squibs) are used to produce the illusion of people being killed. Mob torture tactics include a stint in a meat freezer and a marathon on a treadmill. A thug crushes a man's hand with his vice-like grip to force him to bid on a painting. The man who painted the bloody paintings is killed and shown with a pool of blood around him.

Crude or Profane Language: Two f-words and two s-words mar the dialogue of this PG-13 film. Much worse though is the fact that God and Jesus' names are misused close to 50 times. "H---," "d--n" and other profanity pop up quite a bit as well.

Drug and Alcohol Content: Wine and cigarettes are consumed.

Summary: As Mob films go, Mickey Blue Eyes is far tamer than most, but the question must be asked, "Is crime worthy of laughs?" Mickey spends nearly two hours getting snickers out of Mob activities (extortion, money laundering, murder, arson, intimidation, etc.). Families must evaluate the appropriateness of such humor. Thankfully, the Mobsters are the "bad" guys here, not the heroes.


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